Hey look, buddy. I'm an engineer, that means I solve problems.

Not problems like "What is beauty?", 'cause that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.

I solve practical problems!

For instance, how am I gonna stop some big mean Mother-Hubbard from tearin' me a structurally superfluous new behind?

The answer? Use a gun. And if that don't work, use more gun.

Like this, heavy-caliber tripod-mounted little-old-number designed by me.

Built, by me.

And you best hope...

Not pointed at you.